Monday, June 20, 2011

Like A Candy Wrapper In An Updraft

I'm Sooaaarrriing!!!

Well, okay. Not so much. And yes, I am slightly sad that I can quote Homer as much as I do. 

But I'm feeling good. I've reduced my hours for work for awhile. Some days I can do everything, some days I can't do much at all.  I'm balancing....

I covered the wall in the bedroom with paper... NO MORE MARKER MESS. At least for a little while.  

I got my brain back into work mode. I made it through my whole list of to-do's today.  I have clean clothes to wear tomorrow and my boys have full dressers for a change.

It feels great to be useful again. I've transferred my calendar details to a calendar that I can sync on my phone. I've added my daily and weekly routines to my evernote account. I like that you can use little checkboxes to mark what you have done.  I can use this on my my laptop, the phone and the iPad. So it's everywhere I go, and the family has easy access to these lists too (in case they ever get sick and decide to help out).

Well, mostly feels great. I'm pretty darn lonely.

Congratulations! You are the winner 
of a whole evening BY YOURSELF! 
**You have to do the dishes, switch the laundry, sweep the floors, 
scrub the marker off the wall, check the backpacks,and deal with your kids 
when they aren't listening and sitting still watching their movie...but 
you WIN.

Am I bitter?  Nooooo.............

The Trucker tried to help, I know he meant well.  But, he tried to distract a 7 year old and a soon-to-be 3 year old with a movie. Poor misinformed man.... This little girl doesn't sit for 5 minutes unless she's sick.  I get left at the messy table with the dishes.   And the million questions and interruptions I got were not from him, but from Art who is trying to be helpful. (I think). Just mostly about him, and probably things he said out of frustration. Like "Why isn't your mother distracting Angel Baby?" which leads to Art running upstairs to say "Mom, Dad wants you to come downstairs and try to distract Angel Baby."  I may have been faster and been able to watch part of the movie with them if not for so many stops & starts, but.... I've seen that movie anyway. 

My poor trucker. He didn't know that Art was running up and down the stairs harassing me. The look of pure confusion on his face when I flipped my lid didn't register with me until I had already started the lecture.  He's been known to send Art to do his dirty work before.  And Art went very quickly into hiding, realizing that he was busted for blaming dad.

I've now calmly asked Art not to watch movies on that TV on school nights anymore. It's too low, so Angel Baby is in the way. A Lot. And I am not going to spend my time distracting her for them. Unfortunately, the Trucker didn't get the apology he deserves. He told me right where to take my opinions and has gone to sleep. He's up and out at 4:30 most mornings.

Shiny side? Silver lining?  
"Wha-arr Yoooo?" Angel Baby would say..."Ahhh... There Diz"  I see it. 
  1. Trucker did learn a valuable lesson about why it is hard for me to work during the day sometimes. If she is that distracting watching a movie, imagine when you are trying to focus and finish something!
  2. I did have some time without kids. No Helpful toddler in the kitchen with me.
  3. I stepped back and ignored as much as I could and finished my tidying up for the evening. It's done. When I wake up I will have a clean kitchen to look at. And I'll have clean clothes to put on.
  4. I didn't try to control everything, I let the trucker deal with the kids until I was finished my stuff.
  5. When I crawl in bed shortly, I know that I can snuggle up to the trucker and he'll just let me. He'll roll over and I can tell him I love him and we will sort the rest out later.
For every success, there are some fails first right? I have got to get a handle on my moods though. I hold on for so long but when I blow, watch out. I don't like that side of me. At All.

Now. Cup of tea and a book for me. Start over tomorrow.

Good night! 

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